APPLES ARE EVIL

I spent the other day, and most of yesterday, working on twenty four large jars of canned apples.

TWENTY. FRIGGEN. FOUR.

Look at these shiny red bastards. They're so pleased with themselves for being so red.

That's cutting them up, cooking them JUST enough that they don't turn into mush, making a sugar free syrup juice thing to fill the jar since my boyfriend's mom can't have sugar, washing all the jars to make sure they're sanitized, boiling the lids, filling the jars and sealing them up as tight as possible while they're still hotter than holy hell, then submerging the jars in boiling water for about twenty minutes (it ended up being an hour of boiling for each batch, since we didn't have a pot big enough, and when boyfriend's mom got one, I had to reheat the entire contents of the jar back to boiling temperature to make sure everything got completely sanitized and heated, so I had to let the sealed jars boil for an HOUR, each batch, and I could only fit a few jars in at a time, so you can imagine how long this took) and constantly checking them while they cooled to make sure the lids popped, so that they'd be sealed properly and die the horrible green fuzzy death of gross.

I never want to see another apple again in my life.